Melody's Story- Music and Piano

I am grateful for this opportunity I’ve had to be a part of this project and share my testimony with others through the gift of music.  Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved composing songs on the piano.  At a young age, I remember coming up with little melodies in my head and running down to the piano (sometimes way past my bedtime) and figuring out the melody on the piano before I forgot it. Then, within days a song would come out.  It’s ironic that my parents knew to call me Melody, and I knew that the gift I was given was from our Heavenly Father as a way to share my testimony.  In my patriarchal blessing, I am encouraged to not be shy about sharing this gift.  However, I’ve struggled with how to go about doing so.

A few months ago, I decided to pray for a way to share this gift of music, and to know how to do it.  The very next night, I received a phone call.  I had missed it at first and saw that I had a voice message and text.  The text was from Emily Tingey, a girl that was in my neighborhood growing up that I hadn’t seen in years.  She had mentioned that she was working on a project and wondered if I could help her with it.  Before listening to the voice mail, I had a distinct impression that I should say yes to this project that she needed help with.  After calling her back and hearing about her experience and how she needed help sharing it through music, I knew without a doubt that this was an answer to prayer.  I have never been great at writing lyrics, but writing music was something that came so easily to me. I was so grateful that night that Heavenly Father answered my prayer so quickly and blessed me with a great opportunity to share not only this gift, but my testimony.  I know that He listens to us and wants to be a part of our lives if we just allow Him to be.

The story of how this song came about is pretty amazing, and it’s even more evident to me of the Lord’s hand in our lives.  Throughout the next week, as I was thinking about this song, I had a melody come into my head.  It would come and go and it was hard to remember exactly how it went.  A few days later, Emily and Marlene came to my house to go over the lyrics that Marlene wrote.  I asked Emily if she had a particular melody she wanted me to use, and she said the same thing- there was one that would come and go and she just couldn’t pin it down.  She asked me if I could go to the piano with them there and just start playing whatever came to my mind.  A little surprised, I sat down at the piano, started messing around a little bit, and then suddenly that melody came.  The little song in my head that I had been hearing just came out of thin air.  I had never had a song come so quickly before; I think it surprised all of us in that moment.  I turned to Emily, who was in tears, and asked her if what I played was ok.  She said “that was the melody I’ve been hearing!” There was such a special feeling in the room then and within the next few days of finishing the song. Within two days, the piano part and melody was finished.  I had never written a song so quickly. It was such an amazing process of writing those parts- I really can’t explain how it all came so fast.  Every time I had a chance to sit at the piano, I would pray that the Lord would help me to know how to write this.  He helped me as I sat at the piano and played around until the rest of the melody would come.  There were times that I was concerned that I wouldn’t have the time that day to finish it.  But, somehow within minutes the piece by piece would come.  He also helped me know what parts I needed to change until it was just perfect.I have never felt that I wrote this song alone, it truly was as if there were little angels helping me along the way.  We joke that it is the song from angels in heaven, but after the process of writing it- I don’t doubt that is the case.

 I believe that this song can be a source of healing for people who have not alone suffered the loss from a miscarriage, but also the loss of loved ones old and young.  I have not experienced a miscarriage, although a few days after writing this song I came close to.  A few weeks after completing the song, I had a lot of complications with the pregnancy of my third son that sent me to the hospital on bed rest for 5 weeks.  During that time, I felt the presence of angels helping me, my son, and my little family through the whole ordeal.  I felt the power of the priesthood as my sweet husband administered many blessings to me, helping me to stay pregnant as long as I could to help our son to grow.  I felt the power of the atonement as I turned to our Savior Jesus Christ, knowing that He is truly the source of comfort and healing.  He answered my prayers many times through the help of others here on the Earth, as well as those who have passed through this life.  

There were many miracles along the way, and at 30 weeks our sweet son arrived to us. He is currently at the NICU, but we feel so grateful to have made it so far. He is doing much better than he otherwise would have been without the help of many prayers, fasting, and the priesthood.  I know without a doubt that the power of the priesthood is real, and it is there to bless, heal, comfort, and lift us.  Every time I visit the NICU  is such a special and tender experience. I have often felt the presence of angels helping our little son, as well as the other sweet babies there, to comfort and help when I cannot be there with him. I know that he has a spirit that was mature, strong, and intelligent before he came to this life.  Every time I hold him, I feel that amazing spirit and know that he is so close to heaven.  I know that every person that comes to this earth is a spirit son or daughter of our Heavenly Father. He knows everything about us.  He wants us to remember Him and His son always, and when we do, we can always have His amazing spirit with us.  I am so grateful for that knowledge.

As mentioned before, I have never lost a child, and I hope that I never have to experience such a loss. I admire those who have gone through such trials, and I hope that they can feel a sense of peace and comfort in knowing that they can be with their children again.  I did, however, experience something as a teenager that brought with it a lot of the same feelings.  When I was 16 years old, I was a lifeguard at a local water park.  One such day, I tried to save a sweet 4 year old boy who was drowning, and was unable to resuscitate him.  I struggled with many sore feelings after that.  Although truly I knew that I did all that I could to help revive and save him, I struggled with wondering why- why was I not able to save him? Why did he have to leave? Didn’t I do everything possible? I think of his mother often, and how she must have felt that day and how she may feel today.  

As a mother of three boys, I can’t imagine going through something as tragic as losing a child.  I have sought healing, comfort, and peace through the gospel of Jesus Christ.  He knows my heart.  He knows my struggles. And, he knows how to heal me.  Of course, the burden of those feelings has not completely gone away.  But, the burden is lighter.  I have been able to accept that I did all that I could to help that little boy, and to trust that it was the Lord’s will for him to pass on and perform other missions.  I know that our loved ones that have passed on are still here, even though we might not see them. They are here to help us, and to answer our prayers in times of need.  I hope that through this song, I can somehow share it with this sweet boy’s mother.  I hope that she can find the same comfort in knowing that although she cannot physically see her son, he has never really left her. I have felt his sweet spirit around me as I’ve worked on this song. I am so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ that teaches us these truths.  I know that we can be with our families forever.  I know that our Savior Jesus Christ lives to bless us with his love.  I know that Heavenly Father knows us, more than we know ourselves.  If we turn to Him, he will bless our lives with so much joy and happiness than we ever thought possible.  I know this life is meant for us to grow and learn.  It may not be a piece of cake all the time- but it can be such a wonderful experience if we allow God to be a part of it.  I’m grateful for the gifts and talents he has blessed me with to be able to share my testimony with others, and I hope that I can continue to do so.